I want to be fat. No really, hear me out. When I figure my BMI, a number I don’t fully understand or believe in, I am not fat, I’m obese. What a fun word. That means I have a long way to go to be skinny so for now I think I should focus on getting back to fat. It seems too onerous to be skinny from where I am right now. I believe that it is possible in time, but I think setting a more realistic interim goal will help me to stay focused and not get frustrated with the pace of my progress.
Deep down I don’t know if I am ready to be skinny. I have always been big and I draw some of my identity from my heft. My size was useful during my football playing days. My quick wit and sarcastic tendencies probably developed as a defense mechanism for my weight. But I do not play football anymore and I am beginning to think that I could still be funny while skinny.
On a positive note, I followed through all week with my photo food journal and lost seven pounds. I know it is mostly water weight but it did make me more aware of my food intake and I had a more nutritious diet this week. I have planned to make Saturdays a free day where I can eat an occasional greasy cheeseburger or pizza without beating myself up. I got up this morning and evaluated my breakfast options and decided that even though I had planned to go get biscuits and gravy from a local breakfast spot I decided that I really did not want to eat such a carb-loaded calorie-filled non-nutritious mess so I opted to splurge with an omelet instead.
I am on my way to being fat and I look forward to being able to show off my fat physique while resetting my goals further to shoot for skinny.
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